What an interesting morning I had with my daughter Alex on Friday, May 1st. She has been going to church in Racine on Sundays while she’s in college that she has really enjoyed. She had told me how different this church was from what she is used too. And it concerned me a little since I've always grown up under the Catholic Faith. However, having watched her grow in her Faith these past few months, how could I possibly try to pull her in a different direction?
She has grown so much! When she comes home to visit she carries her Bible and reads it before going to bed and has bookmarks and pages highlighted and can remind me of a passage she read that might be similar to something we are dealing with. It made me very proud. I could have discussions with her about things I had read throughout life that tested my own knowledge of what I have learned over the years. It’s been very nice and I think I finally see a passion in Alex that she’s always tried to explore here with me, but was always sidetracked by the “world” and not always looked upon as the sort of thing a “normal” teenager would embrace.
She always kept trying though. In elementary school she was like the only child who actually loved Catholic Sunday school. But because the other kids were disruptive and many times not receptive to the class, they learned very little. I even removed her for a few years, bought the books they used and taught her at home until she was in middle school. At that time, it got a little easier with kids starting to behave a “little better”, and her being a bit older could handle most of it. She joined the churches student council to try to remain active. One year I think I pulled her again and home schooled her because the teacher just could not keep the kids from bullying her. Then in High School she went back and had this beautiful woman, Ann Hayden, who is an absolute Saint. She also teaches Public High School deep in the city of Milwaukee where she KNOWS how to handle students. So Alex felt safe with her. While taking her classes at St. Peter’s she would go to Youth Group meetings at a different church in Jackson after being invited by a friend. It wasn't a Catholic Church and she was afraid our family would be disappointed in her, but they didn't try to change her religion, they invited her to read from her Bible and discuss what she has learned as a Catholic. The kids at this Youth Group wanted to be there and were all so kind and loving, she was immediately in a good place. So she attended both. She went to winter retreats with this new family and was able to go to Steubenville, a Catholic Youth Retreat with the kids from Slinger. In the aspect of loving Christ, all of there treats were awe inspiring and she learned so many wonderful things. But when looking for your place, there was a difference in how she felt with the people who surrounded her. The Youth Group kids from Jackson were so kind and inviting. Where, with the students she grew up with all her life in Slinger she felt far from that… They never really let her in their hearts or truly accepted her. Of course they were beautiful young people who went with her because they were there on their own free will wanting also to be a part of God and to feel him and to know him and to deepen their Faith. But it wasn’t the same. She was still searching for her own place and her own people who would be there with her on this journey.
And I think she found it. She had asked me a few months ago if I would go with her to an Open House her church was having on May 1st at a satellite location in Kenosha where they have a school of worship. She had sat in on a couple of their classes before and since they were having an Open House she wanted me to see what it was all about. I guess, even though she told me what church was like (very different from a Catholic Mass) I wasn’t really prepared for what I was about to encounter. It was a bit overwhelming at first! And I say that with respect!
From the moment I got out of the car we were met by two students (college aged kids) holding the doors open and welcoming you inside, asking you your name, where you’re from and those that knew Alex already hugged her, while they shook my hand. Then inside we walk into the church sanctuary and a band is practicing for the morning service, all made up of more students who are all taught how to play an instrument or how to sing. All yelling hello as we approach. I saw chairs and I put my stuff down and was going to sit to read the “Open House” itinerary but there was no time! More students poured in and each one took a moment to stop, introduce themselves, give out hugs and talk to us! Normal everyday teenagers who looked like they had just gotten up and made it to school in the nick of time! But none missing a beat in making sure they said hello. Many of them from Europe who were here living with host families while they attended a 9 month course on learning worship. A 9 month session that is nearing an end and as many of the kids shared with me, excited but yetnervous about going back home.
At home they have their families and friends that they miss very much, but here they are surrounded in constant love, all day, every day. Here they are living a life of worship with God and everyone they are with are like them… so full of the Holy Spirit and able to spread the word of God without feeling threatened or set apart from others. At home they will have to focus on being back in their everyday life,many starting college in the Fall and afraid that they won’t be strong enough to keep teaching and spreading God’s word. All spending time praying while I was there, asking God to PLEASE not allow them to disappoint Him by faltering in their Faith once they are back home and on their own.
We started our morning at the Open House with a Music Ministry for 40 minutes. I was ready to sit down and listen to the band but no one sat down. Everyone stood between the chairs and the front of the church, waiting for the music to begin. Alex informed me that everyone dances. I was like “Really?” She said I could sit but I’d be the only one. Well..whoa… I have no balance anymore with my MS and the thought of dancing seemed impossible, but I at least stood to be a part of the opening ceremony. Something that these students do every single day to get their day started! And yep.. it was a great way to wake up and feel better about your day!
For forty minutes the band played Christian songs and the students listened to the words and would “Praise God”if that certain phrase meant something to them. When the music was loud and heightened some of the kids would jump up and down and the floor would shake and they just got so taken away in it all. None of them touched another or even looked at each other. They were all in their own worlds. When the music would go to a quieter rhythm, some would reach for a microphone and read averse they marked in the Bible; sing a song themselves that they needed to just sing; or say a prayer of their own while the others yelled, “Amen” or “Praise you Jesus”, it was all so inspiring to see these beautiful young people completely and wholly embracing their Faith! How can I not appreciate what I was seeing? Yes, it was different and strange to me, but it was also one of the most amazing things I’ve ever watched. By the time it was nearing the end of the 40 minutes some of the kids were so overwhelmed that I saw some boys crying. I just wanted to give them a hug but it seemed that this is their time… they are working out whatever it is with God Himself at that time and it really seemed inappropriate to approach them.
When Music Ministry was over we went for a small break before heading out to join in on some classes the students are finishing up for the year. At break I got to meet more of the students and learned how they absolutely love being there. Not only do they teach you about worship but they teach you how to play keyboard and any other instrument you’d like to learn. They told Alex that if she has the chance to take the 9 month worship classes to jump at it. It was a dream come true for them!
The first class we sat in was a Music class on reading music and being able to write your own songs and what chords to choose. We were completely lost but the class full of students were really knowledgeable about what would sound best and the teacher would play it in the chords they chose to see if it did sound okay. It was really interesting!
The second class was Music also but dealt with picking out notes by just listening to a song and knowing exactly what they were. That was harder for the students but many were able to do it very well. The teacher told us that none of them knew much about this before coming there but now they've been there long enough that they’ve come a long way. It was very impressive.
The last class we sat in was supposed to be a Theology class but they had a special speaker that came in and he was fascinating too. He hadn't seen these kids since they started in the Fall and his first discussion was on how they were feeling about going home. He shared with him others that he’d seen who were so full of the Holy Spirit when they left there and now, years later, they let the real world of people’s criticisms get to them and they fell away from their own Faith. And he agreed that it’s going to be hard. That every day he has to fight the urge of allowing people’s cynicism to change him and chooses to keep spreading the Word of God without allowing them to take over his own spirit. But it's hard!
He read verses from the Bible and asked each student to listen to the message and if they felt the need they should speak a prayer out loud in relation to that verse and how they interpret it in their own lives. He said that’show you need to live your lives. Read,pray and live it!
Many students would listen and then bow their heads and say a prayer asking God to please guide them based on what they just heard while the other students raised their hands and said, “Yes Lord, I want that too” or “Amen”… It was mesmerizing… but even more so when he asked them all to pray in Tongues. YES Tongues! Now that was a trip! (To put it mildly!) The whole room breaking out in Tongues, absolutely not making any sense to me but beautiful.. seriously, it was really something to behold and feel the outpouring of “real feeling” that they had coming from their souls. I’ve never seen anything like it. I've been always taught to be skeptical. Catholics believe that in the beginning of the church some followers were given the gift of Tongues, but to just be able to speak it without some miraculous gift to the very few seemed as if that was how it was. And to “pretend”that you have the gift was highly frowned upon. So Tongues always concerned me. But not then. Right there in the moment, watching these kids fully engulfed in prayer and then speaking in Tongue was remarkable! It’s not a language taught, its something you pray for and if your fully engaging with the Lord he will grant you the gift. (And I know this because since leaving I did some research since finding it so engaging while I was there!) What’s really exciting is that they mostly sound the same.. they make the same kind of sounds.. almost Arabic sounding in nature if you needed to somehow explain it.
In any case, all in all I learned a lot with only being with these people for 4 hours. I can see why Alex feels so good about goingto church on Sunday. They use the same music ministry to start their day and then they fully engulf scripture for another hour afterward. She loves thatit is a 2 hour service!
It also made me realize how the majority of our world are Christians, yet only a handful embrace it like these students with their whole heart and soul. And it’s because we feel like people will be afraid to speak so openly about their Faith without being criticized or looked upon as someone to be afraid to talk to. Someone who’s going to shove their ministry down your throat. When if we all just shared how we truly feel about God without being afraid all the time, we’d probably see that MOST of us already do have a strong Faith but also feel nervous about being more open.
I see now, after ALL these years that Alex has finally found that place that fits her soul. That inspires the love she has always felt but couldn't explain. A place that she feels she can be herself, share her Faith and not feel influenced by others who just didn't understand. It looks like she has finally found what she’s been searching for all these years. And in addition, besides the wonderful friends she already had, she also has a whole new group of friends who are absolutely amazing! I am so happy for her and couldn't be more proud!
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