I Was an Outcast

                People were mean, and I seemed to be bullied for no reason, all throughout my schooling years. Starting in 4K. I guess that's not normal. Kindergarten and 1st grade are supposed to be amazing, but I didn't experience that. By the time you enter high school, you have a label that sticks with you, that you can't rid yourself of. You are the label, and nothing else. I thought for sure mine was "The literal scum of the Earth, girl with ugly curly hair that's quiet, and hangs around with the weird people." I along with some of my group of friends were treated poorly. People would talk about us behind our backs. Before writing this post I remember one moment in particular that has stuck with me.

             My school had a thing where every two years they would take a trip to Washington D.C. and New York during one week of the summer. I and a few of my friends signed up. For our day in New York City we went to the Hard Rock Café for lunch. It got fairly full, me and my 3 other friends sharing a booth. A booth that could fit 3 people on each side, so we had room. Two guys who were considered kind of popular were placed with us by a waitress. A group of popular kids pulled up extra chairs to their table, and they decided to sit with them, which was fine. However what followed was not okay. A few weeks later there was a group picture of the two guys sitting at the table at the Hard Rock Café with the caption "We saved you." (This was on Facebook).

           Saved you from what? Was it so terrible that you almost had to sit with us? If you had stayed with us maybe you would of learned something. That we really weren't as grotesque as our labels. I was also the talk on Facebook at least 4x I'm aware of. The ones I wasn't supposed to see, but came upon, so who knows how much more there were.

           I literally came to think of myself as being "too ugly", no one dared have a crush on me, or any of my other friends. So I just accepted it. I was probably one of the ugliest girls in our grade. (Of course I don't believe that anymore, but labels are so sticky, and seemingly brainwashing.)

        Another thing I was labeled with in school was being the "quiet girl". It wasn't because I didn't have anything to say, but because my self-esteem became so low, and if I spoke no one would care to listen anyway. (Which is why I think it's so important to give voice to the ones people overlook.) I was mostly quiet during my classes, but once with my friends I was loud, and I really do think being together encouraged us to talk. Before I hung around some of these people, they just wouldn't talk. But after a little time being friends, they were now the loud ones. There voices were heard in our friend group and validated, and that made things okay. We were in this together. The "leftovers" together. Not the "leftovers" alone. The ones just trying to survive high school, which I can gladly say we all did.

               Some people think if I would of hung out with the people I did, I'd be more accepted. First of all, how dare you!? You don't know me, and you don't really know any of them. You haven't even given me or any of them the time of day, so why do you assume they're so insignificant? Everyone's life has a purpose, and to treat some people like they're not important, like their life doesn't matter, or how low of a purpose they have compared to you. Sorry, not sorry, but that is evil. I'm glad I was part of the group of people that I was, I didn't have to act evil to anyone. I just accepted anyone, especially those who felt they weren't special, and honestly that's so important. Looking at a person, and truly seeing them.

   To end, treat people nicely whoever they are. They deserve it, and their life has meaning. So treat them that way.

        This is kind of off topic but really confused me about high school. A lot of the guys acted like total morons. Even the smart ones acted like they were 10 years old. I'm not kidding, I wish I were. Like they made fun of such childish things. Wow you have train tracks on your teeth (braces). I'm sorry but this is high school....focus on something else. They also answered questions as if they were 10 years old and didn't know anything. I know they say boys are immature, but this took it to such an extreme level, and I've never met a guy who acted in such a way since then. It's hard for me to even explain accurately how they acted because it just doesn't make any sense.