Just Some Updates

            It's a little harder to know how everyone's been doing during this time. You get to have less real conversations without talking to people face on face. Like most people I've had time to reflect on things, and thought I'd post some updates on my life now, including one really exciting thing which I will talk about last.

           I work with kids with Autism and am currently meeting with them via Zoom 1-2 times weekly. It's gone way better than thought. I thought I wouldn't be able to meet with most of the kids, but I've been able to meet with almost all of them and they are showing amazing progress including a 2 and a half year old who is starting to read 5-letter-words even though he is mostly non-verbal. He shocks me every time I meet with him, and I truly think he will be a genius one day.

         Secondly, I got hired as an Instacart shopper. At the beginning of the lockdown, I basically didn't do much, and that made me feel useless so after the encouragement of people from my homegroup I decided to give it a shot. I've been really enjoying it, and do it pretty much most times when I'm free and there's an order at one of the stores closest to my home. I might be an odd person for enjoying this job so much, since it is buying people's groceries, but for me it's like this thrilling scavenger hunt, and I also love the fact I'm able to make a difference in people's lives during this time. I always make sure to wear a mask, and wash my hands frequently as to not pass along whatever I may have or vice versa. I've been able to help out 31 different families so far by doing this, and learned the layout of the stores pretty well :D

       Finally, and most excitingly my anxiety is the best it has ever been in a really long time since April, which is highly ironic. With much of the world in a very anxious state, I'm doing really well. It's so strange that it definitely feels like it's a miracle, especially since I'm at my parent's house since lockdown started. A place that gives me the most anxiety due to a lot of my past panic attacks being here. I can move around and not feel fear, and that feels so good. I can do things for myself. Anything. I can go places without fear, or fear I'm going to have a panic attack any minute. I finally feel like I'm in the present. As I type this out in the back of my mind I have doubt. Doubt that this could last forever, or that I could revert back to my old way of being/thinking any minute, and that really sucks. But I pray and I hope that God did a miracle, and maybe that way of thinking/being is a thing of the past. It's hard to know for sure, but right now I am enjoying it while it last. It feels good to be able to do things for myself again and way more without fear weighing me down.

One of the Things I Miss the Most: Concerts

     Every introduction to anything during this pandemic has made mention of the pandemic, and this is no different since it's why I'm writing this post. It's an effect of something the pandemic has caused. The cancellation of mass gatherings. If I knew back in December that, that would be my last concert for awhile maybe I would have done more. What does awhile actually mean? Will concerts ever even return to normal? If they don't, would I ever be able to afford to go to another concert.

    It's weird how before this pandemic occurred no one was really afraid to get close to each other. You are in a close proximity with tons of people at a concert and no one thought twice about that, besides the fact someone may be invading your space or maybe all the people close together was creating a higher temperature in the room. There really wasn't much worry about how the person next to us might pass us their germs, at least I never really worried about that. I guess it's similar for sports fans gathering in stadiums, or seeing a show at a theatre. I pray that within a shortish amount of time things will be able to go back to full capacity, and there won't always be restrictions, but this may be wishful thinking.

     Will celebrities still do meet n' greets or would the risk be to high, and giving multiple hugs or handshakes, or taking pictures with fans will be a thing of the past. I have a lot of questions, but I guess they'll all be answered in time, and I can look back at this post, knowing all the answers to these questions. Like will people at concerts have to socially distance themselves from each other. A smaller crowd of people all at least 6 feet of part just listening to music instead of the typical concert experience. Singing back the lyrics to the musicians, and dancing with each other, following the instructions of the musicians. The musicians parting the crowds as they walk through. Is that all a thing of the past? With social distancing in place at least for a little while, will that cause concert tickets to sky rocket, since only a certain amount of people are allowed to go to these concerts, and it has to be enough to be worth it for the musicians to not lose out on money.
   
     Lastly I'd like to take a moment to mention God in this post. How if concerts as I knew them and loved them has to be a sacrifice I make in life then I will. If I have to give up concert forever or for a long time then I guess I am glad to do it . He makes every sacrifice worth it, and God has been teaching us a lot about sacrifices throughout this pandemic. Sacrifices of social interaction, sacrifices of food selection, sacrifices of going to different places, etc. As I reflect on concert I'll share a couple of photos from concerts taken last year.