I've come a long way, but I still have self-doubt ad I'm sure we all do. I felt a bit of self-doubt come on last week. Thankfully, I was able to combat it quickly, but it brought some important things to mind.
The situation: I met up with people my age over the weekend at one of their houses. When I got there no one seemed too excited I was there. (Totally my perception and not about any of their characters, they're wonderful people.) I ended up leaving early since they hung out past midnight and I knew I had to be up early the next morning. When I left it also didn't seem like anyone cared too much. On the car ride home I felt a little down. I thought about how I wasn't really a person most people got excited about seeing. How I felt misunderstood, and more like I was in the background, undervalued, etc.
I then thought of the people who I knew did value me, and how I knew I did. The love they showed, the big hugs they gave, the encouragement they had given, and I felt better. Our church's message of the week ended up being on encouragement, and during young adults group at my church I felt comforted. My identity as a child of God had been restored.
That's not the end of the story. At homegroup (groups of people from church your put into) we discussed encouragement and it's importance. How the people with a gift for encouragement appear. Two of the people who stuck out to me were two people that I always felt valued by, and have a gift for making everyone seem like the most valuable. When you walk in a room, and you're friends with one of these girls, chances are they will excitedly say your name. They make me feel seen. I don't need any reminders to know my life is valuable but it's good to feel valued at times. At homegroup this lead to the discussion on the importance of welcoming people. At my church we have people who volunteer as welcomers, and welcome all the people who enter the church whether they are a member or are new. When someone new comes to our church, they don't feel lost in the crowd and like no one notices them. They feel seen, and that's one of the things I love about my particular church. People actually want to know you, like really know you not just surface level. Telling someone that you're glad that they're there. Complimenting them on something they do well. Letting someone know they are loved, etc.
Another thing I thought of is how often encouragement is thought and not told. There's a good chance when I was hanging out at the house that there were people that did value me, actually I'm sure of it. Maybe in their heads when I walked in they thought "Oh I'm so happy Alex is here, she is so kind." I know a lot of times when I see someone I know and care for, I only occasionally encourage them and tell them. I'm more introverted, so when someone comes in the room or leaves I might give a simple "hi" or "bye" when inside I'm so glad that they are there or sad they're leaving. They might not know, and drive home feeling down like I did. Simple encouragements mean so much.
All this to say that the only overall opinion that matters is what God thinks of you. But it really is nice to be reminded of your value as a child of God. We must remain humble when receiving compliments, and know it's not by ourselves that we are the way that we are but because of God.
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