Things I've Learned After Being a Server for A Week

    I work at a school during September- the beginning of June and then have the summer off where I don't make anything. (You can opt to get paid less during your paychecks during the school years so you can get paid during the summer, but I needed the full paychecks, so this wasn't an option for me.) I decided it would be smart to get a job for the summer. Something low stress, fun, and part-time hours so I didn't have to spend my whole summer working, and could recover from the school year. If you've read the title you might see where this is going  I applied to be a server, and got the job. However, this is by no means a low stress job at all, and with how short-staffed the food industry is right now, I am working more than I wanted. I started working at Applebee's this month, and since then have learned a ton about what it means to be a server. (With my first job I worked in a nursing home dining room where residents could order off menus with only three items, which was kind of similar but not really.) Here's a list of what I have learned so far, and why your servers deserve the tip you give them. 

 1) Servers can be dealing with up to six tables at one time, and each table could need something different, at one time. The server has to keep in mind what every table needs and figure out a solution that will cause the least amount of frustration for each customer. Be patient with them if they forgot you had asked them for another Pepsi, etc. 

2) The servers may have put your order in the right way to your specifications, but that doesn't always mean the line cooks have cooked it to your specifications. (We usually make sure its cooked to your specifications but be patient with us when you asked for a specific specification but it didn't come that way). 

3) This is common sense but if the restaurant is busy, the kitchen is dealing with a lot of orders so it's probably going to take longer. Most restaurants are offering curbside pickup so the restaurant may be even busier than it appears. 

4) Servers and other staff are usually at the restaurant an hour after closing cleaning and organizing the kitchen and dining room/ wrapping silverware. Jobs include putting sauces back in the fridge, putting away dishes, wiping down surfaces, sanitizing flavoring nozzles/soda nozzles, making sure items are stocked, vacuuming the floor, sweeping up things, wiping down the windowsills etc. (At Applebee's we have a specific job we're assigned to do based on what section we were assigned to wait on during our shifts) 

5) Most people tip less than 15% or only $5 and servers rely on these tips. I've gone home making less than $30 in tips after a 6 hour shift and multiple tables all served well. Some people don't tip at all, and that's really difficult to deal with. (The two times I haven't been tipped have been on tables with 6+ people making huge food orders and drink orders.) It took along time to put in the order and make sure it was accurate and make sure it was accurate in the kitchen as well. It also takes multiple trips to get all of the food out of the kitchen. 

6) Sometimes the line cooks forget to make one of your sides so it takes longer to reach your table. (Mistakes happen and I appreciate the line cooks so much!) 

7) Sometimes the computer system gets messy and it takes longer for you to get your credit card back. They haven't forgotten to bring you your credit card back the computer just sucks sometimes. 

8) After hours of consistently walking around, your feet start to hurt but the only break you get is when there's a lull in people coming or when you need to use the bathroom. We seldom if ever get a chance to sit down. 

9) We don't eat at all or very little.  Shifts are usually upwards of 6 hours and you eat very little or nothing. You dont get a lunch break or dinner break (at least at Applebees) but you can bring snacks, and eat them when you have a lull in service. Otherwise when a meal is brought back into the kitchen because their was a mistake you can eat that. Which is glorious. 

10) Dine and Dash. If you've never heard this term, consider yourself lucky. It's where people come into a restaurant, get their food, eat it, and leave before paying. It happens, and it happened to me. With a huge order ^ one of the ones mentioned above that didn't end up tipping. Don't do it. 

11) I myself didn't get sufficient training which I do not blame the restaurant for, they are understaffed right now and need as many servers as possible, so be patient with new servers who have to ask other staff questions. They're still learning everything.  The menu and what comes with what and what alcohol we serve takes a bit to learn. 

12) You're doing better than you think. I felt like I didn't do a good enough job because I had a hard time dealing with four tables at once on a Saturday night and made a mistake on Sunday night (Father's Day). Of course there were valid reasons for my not doing a perfect job and that's okay. All servers make mistakes. We all want to be good at the jobs we do, just don't be too hard on yourself. It takes time but you'll get it. 

13) I'm not sure if this happens in other restaurants but when you clock out, and put in the amount you made in tips, if you didn't make a certain amount it alerts the manager.  (Either you're a bad server or/and more likely you had low tippers and it had nothing to do with your quality of serving. 

14) The servers rely on tips, since they only make around $2.50/hr. on their own. If you don't tip the server only makes $2.50 for that hour or longer of service, and worked hard for barely anything to show for it. 

  I'll probably add more to this list, but this is what I've observed so far. The next time I go to a restaurant I'm going to have all of this in mind, and think about the way I tip a lot more. 

Christian Book Recommendations

 "Out of the Salt Shaker and Into the World: Evangelism As A Way of Life" By Rebecca Pippert 

    This is my top favorite Christian book that I've read. It was recommended to me by a friend when I wanted to learn more on the topic of Evangelism. I took so many notes off of this book, and even bought a copy for myself after returning my friend's copy because I loved the book so much. This book paints Jesus as the main evangelist, and biblical examples from his life.  This book is encouraging, and offers practical tips at becoming better at evangelism. 

"The Final Quest" By Rick Joyner 

    I was introduced to this book when attending the School of Worship. One of our teachers read us the first chapter out of the book, and I was immediately hooked. I needed to get a copy myself to find out what happened next in the story. This story is written about a vision that Rick Joyner, the author, had over a year.  The vision provides a visual of the battle between light and darkness. It also provides great imagery of spiritual warfare. This book is a part of a trilogy with this one being the first.

 

"God's Lavish Grace" By Terry Virgo 

This book was recommended to me by one of the people at my church, when I had first joined Living Light, and had gotten serious about living for God. They let me stay at their house a couple of days when my anxiety was bad. (Going home always gave me a lot of anxiety, thankfully it doesn't anymore). This book was left out on the nightstand, and the lady recommend I read it if I wanted. I read part of it then, and really liked it.  On the School of Worship this was one of the required books to read, and each week we would read a chapter and discuss it more thoroughly. It gives in depth information on God's grace that he has given to us, and how great of a gift it truly is. 

"A Little Book on the Christian Life" By John Calvin

I just got done reading this book in a women's small group. At first glance looking at it, and knowing the author lived in the 1500s was really daunting. I wasn't sure I'd be able to understand the words he would be using to get his point across. However, I was shocked at how relatable to the world now this book is. A book written over 500 years ago. It was also pretty easy to follow, even though we were reading it at around 6:30 in the morning. This book is heavy, but uses examples on what the Christian life looks like, and the right way to be one. 

"Awake & Alive to Truth: Finding Truth in the Chaos of a Relativistic World" By John Cooper

I was really excited to read this book, once I had heard about it being released, and got a copy for Christmas. (I finished it shortly after :P). This book describes how to live in the world today when there are so many different things trying to tell you what to think. John brings out how to find what is the biblical truth we should believe in the midst of the chaos all around us. It also describes different world views, and what our culture believes and why, and uses stories from his own life. This book was encouraging to stand firm in God when things are tough. 

"You're Not Enough (and That's Okay): Escaping the Toxic Culture of Self-Love" By,Allie Bell Stuckey

The title of this book is counterintuitive, especially when constantly in culture we are told "you are enough." Self-love we are told will make us happier, but we are more self-obsessed than ever before, and we're actually the saddest we've ever been as a culture. We think to much about ourselves, and what we want, think we deserve, but this is shallow and leads to loneliness. Constant reflection on ourselves and our inadequacies as humans instead of looking to God who is truly perfect in everyway. (I've only started reading this book, but I am excited to read more.)

"Humility: The Journey Towards Holiness" By, Andrew Murray 

Humility is a virtue we all need in order to become more Christ-like. It is one of the hardest virtues to accomplish especially in an individualistic society where everyone is so focused on themselves. Even when we think we are doing well with being humble, we probably aren't. It's a consistent battle in life to stay more humble than prideful and this book highlights the importance of humility and how to become more humble. This was another book we went through when I was on the School of Worship.

"The Pursuit of God: The Human Thirst for the Divine" By, A.W. Tozer

The pursuit of God, as the title reveals is about pursuing God in our Christian walks. Not to just believe in him, but to actually pursue what his will is for our lives, and his wants for us. Continuing to follow after him and do his will, even when things get tough. I read this book on the School of Worship, and will pull it out to review it sometimes, just for the great reminders that are within this book. 

"StrengthsFinders 2.0" By, Tom Rath

   Strength Finders is a book based on the Clifton Strengths Asssessment which is an online test you can take in order to assess your strengths. It's not free, however I think it is a good investment. I took it a few years ago and I think it was around $20. The book helps you discover more about your strengths and how to apply them within your workplace, or in the case of Christianity, networking God's purpose in your life. I took this assessment years ago and still I have access to the results of the test to look back on as a reminder. Though not necessarily a Christian book, I feel it is helpful for that as well.

"The Lion and the Lamb" By, Tony Ling

      The Lion and the Lamb contains two books that go through the symbolism/imagery and its meaning in Revelation. This makes Revelation, a relatively difficult book to understand because of its high use of symbolism, easier to understand. It also provides a hopeful and encouraging insight on the end times when it's usually viewed as a frightening topic. A friend had an extra copy of this book, and gave it to me as a gift. 

 

   I will probably add more books to this list as time goes on. I read a lot of books on Christian topics and I'm sure I probably missed one. 😊

 

 

Kentucky Trip (Part 2)

      On Tuesday we headed out early again, in order to get to the Creation Museum when it first opened. Again it was a really nice day. Although the Creation Museum wasn't quite as cool as the ark replica it was still worth seeing. The Creation Museum had a lot of exhibits which showed the biblical view on things, as well as the Evolution or Scientific view of things. The exhibits go in order of the 7 C's of Christianity. Creation, Corruption, Catastrophe, Confusion, Christ, Cross, and Consummation. 

    These exhibits also answered questions I didn't know I had about "The Bible". Like why didn't the animals go after each other before the fall? The answer to this question is because there were no carnivores before the fall. The humans didn't need to hunt animals in order to keep from getting hungry, and the animals didn't have the urge to prey on other animals. Through the exhibits I also discovered that the first animal sacrifice happened right after Adam and Eve had sinned and tried to cover themselves up with the leaves and figs, God sacrificed an animal in order for them to cover up themselves with the hide. It is in "The Bible" but I never realized that, that was the first time an animal had been killed. They had a whole exhibit dedicated to catastrophe/destruction in the world which was really moving. On one of the exhibit doors a message was scratched saying "the world's not safe anymore" and the exhibit also had a lot of screens switching between different dark things in the world. (Nazi's, starvation, drug addiction, etc. ) One of the exhibits went through how we tend to think that the first people were stupid and cavemanlike when they were actually pretty brilliant, and used amazing architecture techniques. Just think of Noah's Ark, or the look of ancient architecture like the pyramids. I have included pictures of different exhibits I took pictures of that answered questions I had or that I thought were cool. Outside the creation museum there were paths, one had a garden with a koi fish pond, and a cherry blossom tree. 

    After exploring the Creation Museum we ate lunch and rested once again. You can fully get through both the ark replica and Creation Museum in 2- 2.5 hours without rushing. That evening I thought it would be a fun idea to go to Cincinnati since the part of Kentucky we were in was very close to there. However, before going into Cincinnati we hit traffic and a 25min drive turned into 40min. We stopped at Findlay market which turned out to be in a sketchier part of the city. I explored the shops around and then we sat outside to enjoy the weather and drank our separate drinks. Mine being an iced caramel latte, After the Findlay Market we went to Eden Park. A park that is located on a hill and overlooks Kentucky. The park also contains a reflecting pool and fountain. The part where you can look over at Kentucky was pretty crowded so we could only get rushed pictures as we drove past. We drove back into Kentucky and I took pictures of the Cincinnati skyline on a bridge back to Kentucky from the car. We got ice cream once we were back in Kentucky since the ice cream place I wanted to explore was closed on Tuesdays in Cincinnati. 

Kentucky Trip (Part 1)

        Since last year my mom had been talking about wanting to go to Kentucky to visit the replica of Noah's Ark. We were finally able to make that a reality during Spring Break, and I organized the trip and booked our hotel. The trip was fairly quick, we left on Easter around 11am and got back Wednesday evening. For our Easter supper we had Dairy Queen, but we were able to eat it outside due to the great weather. 

   We arrived at our hotel at 7pm on Easter, and I was excited to note that they actually had the pool open. When I was originally booking the hotel back in February they had said the pool/hot tub would be closed due to Covid. We never utilized either, but it was great to know. The hotel I picked was actually the perfect spot between the two attractions being the ark replica and the creation museum, which are apart of the same organization. The hotel was also clean, and offered free breakfast, so there isn't anything bad to say about it, thankfully. 

   On Monday we went to the ark replica, built following the directions given to Noah by God in "The Bible" Since we no longer use the measurement of cubits to build things, the researchers tried the best they could to make the best representation of what they thought it would mean (look like). A lot of research went into this project as a whole in order to best answer commonly asked questions on the ark and to build exhibits. The ark was also part museum so it did contain some exhibits and painted a story of life on the ark. This included the living quarters of Noah and his family, and cages with animals that are now extinct that may have been on the ark. For me I took pictures of things that answered questions I never really thought of. Like: How big is a cubit? How did they feed the animals? How many animals did they have to take care of? etc. (They studied ancient civilizations to best guess on what the answers to these questions might be.) For feeding the animals they had bags for food and pots for water which they kept piled up on the side of the ship as away to store them. They also guessed that they had a feeder for the animals which you would only have to fill every couple days and a system of getting rid of the animals poop. Each person would have to take care of an 1/8 of the animals which was a big number but not overwhelmingly big. The animals were kept in cages and not roaming free so they wouldn't harm each other, and only land animals mainly would need to be kept on the ark. I have included the pictures here of answers to common questions so you can read for yourself this cool information. Along with pictures of the ark replica itself.

  After the trip to the ark we had lunch then went back to the hotel to rest. After resting we went to a local mall. 

My Experience With Prosopagnosia (Face Blindness)

       You have probably never heard the word prosopagnosia before. I definitely hadn't until googling symptoms to figure out what I was experiencing and this is what came up. Prosopagnosia is a neurological condition affecting the part of the brain of facial recognition. The rest of your brain functions normally and your vision isn't impaired. I can see people's faces clearly and identify their emotions but it sometimes won't immediately click who the person is.  It's on a spectrum and luckily I only have a mild form. Some people with prosopagnosia aka face blindness have a hard time recognizing their own face in pictures or the faces of people closest to them. 

       A common thing people struggle with is forgetting other people's names. Whereas I have trouble remembering people's faces. I don't remember this really being an issue in my life until I started college. In high school I seemed to recognize all my classmates and teachers, but maybe it's because I grew up with all of the students so it was easier. I recognize my face, my friends faces, and family, but have a harder time remembering faces of people I don't know well yet. This includes professors and classmates when I was at college, coworkers, and people at my church when I first started going. It also makes it hard for me to follow a movie sometimes if they're are a lot of characters. I might not recognize who the character is or if they've appeared in the movie before that moment.  I have a few embarrassing stories related to this condition, because embarrassment can happen a lot with this condition. 

     Story 1: I went to a conference in Pennsylvania with a friend a few years back. He challenged me to introduce myself to three people I didn't know as mission for the day. (Can you see where this is going?) It wasn't so bad that I introduced myself to him or his family thankfully, but I ended up introducing myself to my roommate for the conference. I said Hi, I'm Alex, and she said....yeah....we're roommates. She had already known me...rightfully so...after sharing a room with me and sleeping in a bed right near my bed. I was so embarrassed. 

     Story 2: This happened last year when I didn't recognize a coworker. I worked at various different houses throughout the Kenosha area and when I got to one of the houses one day, I noticed a woman on my client's porch. I waited and didn't get out of my car at first, she ended up turning around and saw me in my car, and must have wondered why I had stayed in my car. I then realized that she was my coworker. There's no reason I shouldn't have been able to recognize her, since we had worked together at that same house so I should have known her face. Embarrassed I got out of my car and joined her. 

    Story 3: This happened a few months ago. At church one morning I was talking to one of my friends, and at the same night I ended up running into her again. She happily rushed over to me, but my face must have looked really lost, but when she started talking I realized who it was.  I apologized for it taking a few seconds for me to realize it was her, and she graciously blamed it on the fact she had been wearing a mask so it was harder to recognize her. (Which could have had an effect). 

    These are just some stories of many. It can be very frustrating. Especially since at places like college or church I'm never sure if I've met some of the people there before, but I'm to afraid to introduce myself just in case we've been going to the same church for years and they'd reply with..."We've definitely met, Alex, many times actually." or something to that extent. I remember a professor seeing me in the hallway at college and smiling at me and saying hi, by the time I realized that she had been talking to me and it had been one of my professors she was gone and I hadn't said hi or smiled back. I felt guilty because she could have thought that I had ignored her. 

   The first day at my new job in the Fall was kind of a mess. All the other staff were introducing themselves left and right, and after awhile I couldn't remember who had introduced themselves to me and who hadn't. So another staff would be like "Have you met Alex yet" and I'd wait for them to answer because I genuinely didn't know. At this point I can thankfully say I can recognize all my coworkers and kids at the school (there's only 10 kids). Through repetition of following a school schedule and hearing their name said and pairing it with their face I have been able to add their faces into my long-term memory. 

Facebook has been a helpful tool for me, as weird as that sounds. On Facebook I can pair someone's profile picture and name together, so when I see them in person I will most likely be able to recognize them easier. This is how this person looks, and this is their name. I'd say I can recognize most if not all of my Facebook friends if I were to see them in person.  It's kind of complicated to explain.

  I will use this last paragraph to apologize to anyone I may not have recognized at all or it took me a little bit to recognize, and I gave you the confused "who are you?" look after you said my name.  I apologize for my brain not working correctly, just be patient with me and know that eventually I'll be able to recognize your face right away if I haven't already. I wasn't ignoring you or being rude, my brain was genuinely confused. It's a weird condition, and whenever I would explain it to people they could only relate it to how they easily forgot people's names and wouldn't struggle with the faces. After looking it up I found out why. Apparently only 2% of people struggle with this same condition. I guess I have a rare brain. Although I'm not sure if that's a good thing. :P 

I hope this blogpost was helpful in learning a little bit more about prosopagnosia. 

This video contains a helpful animation of a situation if you're interested in seeing more. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KHxXe8F_5HQ&t=230s

(Start at 0:58- 2:08)

I'm a Social Introvert with an INFJ Personality

              As some of you know, I am really into the topic of Psychology, and have my Bachelor's in this area. A few years ago I took the Myers Briggs Personality Test, and discovered I was an INFJ, and pretty much left it at that, until last night I got recommended different videos on YouTube of the sixteen personalities and found out that the type of introvert I am is a social introvert, and that an INFJ personality is actually the most rare personality out of the 16. 

          Bear with me here. If you don't know what the Myers Briggs Personality Test even is or what the letters signify. I will give an explanation. The Myers Briggs Personality Test is a questionnaire about different psychological preferences you have in your life, and the way that you do things in life. 

  The First of the four letters indicates whether you are an Introvert ot Extrovert. So for me I am an introvert. The second letter has to do with if you are intuitive or if you use your senses more for gathering information about the world. For me I am more intuitive. The third letter has to do with if you are a more thoughtful or feeling person. It answers the question if we value our emotions or rationality when making decisions For me I am Feeling. The last letter has to do with how people make decisions Judging or Prospective. Judging individuals like to have a plan in their lives, and prospective people deal better with uncertainty and are more flexible. 

     To reiterate I am  an  I= Intovert   N= Intuitive F= Feeling J= Judging  individual. 

    One of the videos  I watched had a link to a blogpost about the  4 types of Introversion: Social, Thinking, Anxious, and Restrained. After reading about all the different types I found that I fell strongly under the social introversion type. If you are an introvert like myself and would like to know which type you are you can go to this website: https://blogs.scientificamerican.com/beautiful-minds/what-kind-of-introvert-are-you/

       Social introverts like to hang out one on one with people or in a small group versus a big group of people. Social introverts also prefer to have deep relationships with people instead of more surfacey ones. Social introverts like all introverts like to have some time for themselves during the day. Also as with all introverts when I am around a lot of people for a few hours, I like to go and be by myself afterwards to recharge. Along with deep relationships I like getting to know people. Another characteristic of a social introvert is how I may be misunderstood by others. 

         After reading up about the four types of introversion I watched a video of 15 facts about INFJ's I will list the ones that most stood out to me for my life in particular. 

   - People with the INFJ personality type feel like outsiders because they are on different wavelengths with how others perceive the world due to their strong intuition. (I have very much felt like an outsider throughout much of my life and do think differently about the world than most people. 

-Exude Warmth and are Welcoming: People feel really comfortable talking to INFJ's and feel comfortable enough even to reveal things about themselves that they don't share with others. (I've had people tell me they think I'm really welcoming, and at my new job a coworker has shared a lot about herself with me, because INFJ's make people feel comfortable and at peace when around them. I love this part of my personality, and that people feel like I can be a safe place to share some hard things with.) INFJ's are also really good listeners. :) 

-Think deeply about other people and why they do the things they do (With my new job I think deeply about what made the kids I work with not do well in school, and how much it has to do with home life, their interactions at school, and other things. Really digging beneath the service, and figuring out what makes each individual unique. If I'm close with someone I can intuitively know how they are feeling and why at points.)

-Ability to feel other's emotions and provide comfort to them through understanding. 

-Very relational and seek to form strong emotional bonds with people. (Although I may seem shy with people I don't know very well, I strive to connect with people on a deep level. Small talk is okay, but I'd much rather have deep and meaningful conversations with people. ) 

-Optimistic in nature (I tend to notice the good in people first and focus on that) . 

-Drawn to people who need help due to their empathetic nature

-Intellectual thinkers: Think deeply about their lives and purpose (this is very me.) Enjoy reading, music, and spiritual matters because of their love for learning new things and gaining more understanding of the world. Because of thinking deeply they might overthink things.

-Gifted in language in their writing instead of speech. INFJ's prefer to share how they feel through writing instead of speech. They are much better at expressing their thoughts through their writing. (This one speaks for itself, and is probably why I am writing this in blog form, and have a talent in writing.) :P Avoid talking a lot or only talk when necessary when it comes to opinionated matters because these conversations can easily turn negative or into gossip. 

    I hope this was an interesting read, and can help you understand me a little bit better. I know after watching this video I have gotten to know myself a little more, and some of the reasons I choose to do the things that I do. Shout out to any other INFJ's out there even though we are the minority :P. Let me know what your Personality Type is, and the things you identify with strongly under that type. 

Things are Changing

      A lot of things have changed as a result of 2020. I feel like I've grown up a lot due to the circumstances. It's been a long year. I've interviewed for different jobs, I got my Bachelor's in Psychology, I moved in with a lady from church only to have to leave in March. I had to file for unemployment for the first time and moved back home from Mid March to the end of September. It was a really good time, but now it's time for me to rent my first apartment in Kenosha.

      I had wanted to get back to Kenosha eventually, but in 2020 everything is so uncertain, I applied for a part-time job for extra income at Bath and Body Works. I got the job, even though I was upfront and honest with her. That this job was for extra income, that I eventually wanted to make the move back to Kenosha, etc Within a week of working at Bath and Body Works, I was asked to interview at a Kenosha high school as an aide. Earlier in the summer I had interviewed with two other schools, who went with other candidates. When interviewing for this job I didn't think I would get the position either. I felt like if I were competing for a job against other potential candidates they weren't likely to choose me.  I was wrong and was offered the job right before the Kenosha riots. The Kenosha riots brought more uncertainty as well as the question of where I would live if I did get the job, and did they hire me out of desperation? I was half way hoping they would change their mind, so I didn't have to disappoint Bath and Body Works and leave shortly after getting hired there. It would be a lot more simple to stay where I am and continue to do what I had for months.I feel like it's going to take getting used to not constantly being around family, and seeing my grandma weekly.  

    However, I prayed for clarity and that's what God did. On the same day I was officially offered the job, I got accepted for my 1st apartment. Not only that, but after talking to a girl from church it was made even more clear. She had worked at Hilcrest the last four years, and knew God was doing things within that school. It doesn't seem like an easy job, and  I am a little anxious but God calls us to do hard things sometimes, and I trust him. He will give me the strength to do this, because he has called me to do it. Through him I will be able to help some of these teenagers get their lives back on track. I feel overwhelmed with all the changes happening, but know I'll be okay once I am settled. 

   God has also taught me about patience. I am patient within my personality and in situations, but not within life events. I wanted a new job, once I got my degree, but the process took awhile. I wanted to live on my own, but that also took sometime. If you're patient however things do fall into place, because he works things together for out good. Although I want things to happen in my life more quickly then they have, I'll keep waiting on God's timing for my life.