Just an Update

    At Parkside I was super good at keeping my anxiety levels down during the Spring Semester, coming home for Summer Break scared me though...A lot.  Coming home for breaks always seemed to heighten my anxiety.  Winter Break hadn't been too good to me.  Because of worrying about how my anxiety levels would be during Summer Break it caused my break to start out with those same anxiety levels I had been worried about.  When the first week of Summer Vacation is going to be spent with friends at a Leadership Conference, it kind of hurts (especially when you had been doing so well).  The pride kept within me told me I couldn't tell anyone I was struggling.  I wanted to be "brave" throughout the whole thing, and not letting myself be brave hurt a bit too.
      I did tell though, and even though it probably didn't make sense it helped to let someone know the inner-demons I was facing.  I went to church the weekend after the Conference and one of my friends reminded me that I wasn't alone, and that everything would be okay.  His words must of been healing because ever since then, I've been doing super good.  I'm not constantly in fear of when the next panic-attack will come, and not surrounded by paralyzing fear all the time.  An irrational fear I had was driving alone which I used to enjoy.  I've been driving long-distances now without fear, even in the dark which used to utterly terrify me.  I have felt so free recently :)  Whether that be because of the amazing friends I have come across this year that I can be 100% myself around, or God's love for me, I've been the happiest I've ever been, and I get so much more out of every single experience now.